Spousal Support for the Writer

How much support should I expect from my spouse as I work on my writing?  While I’m working on my first rough draft I don’t need or want much, except to be left alone while writing.  I usually choose to work on my writing when my husband is at work so it doesn’t interfere with time we could be spending together.  However, during my revision phase it would be really nice for him to be more involved.  But he doesn’t seem interested and that’s frustrating for me.

He has yet to show interest in my project, even though he’s aware I’m working on it.  I decided to ask him to read the book outright instead of waiting for him to.  I printed him a copy and tried to hand it to him.  I said, “It would mean a lot to me if you would read this and give me your opinion.”  He wouldn’t take it or answer.  I raised my eyebrows at him and he said, “I’m thinking.”  I gave him a while to “think” but he never gave me an answer so I put the copy I made by my computer and eventually gave it to someone else (because I can easily print another copy if my husband suddenly shows interest).  When I tried to talk to him about it…well, let’s just say my bringing it up was a bit of a conversation killer.  I couldn’t get him to talk about it at all.

What I don’t understand is that I have many people who want to read my manuscript.  Too many, in fact, for me to accommodate.  But the one person whose opinion means the most to me isn’t interested in taking the time to read it (I’m not asking much, it’s not a difficult read and I’m not looking for him to do hard edits or anything like that, I just want him to read it and tell me what he thinks).  So, is it normal for a non-writing spouse to distance themselves from the other spouse’s writing projects?  I really don’t know, this is new to me.  I’m fine getting the support I need for my writing elsewhere, I just don’t get why I should have to.


2 responses to “Spousal Support for the Writer

  1. I’m not sure if it’s normal, but my husband is the exact same way. Whenever I try to talk to him about it, he clams up. Once in a blue moon he might come up with some little opinion, but he won’t read it. A while ago (about a year?) he said he’d read it once, and only once. So basically, if I want him to read it, it’ll have to be an already finished product. Which is … not all that helpful, really. So, while I’m not any help at all in getting your husband to pay attention to yours, at least you know you’re not alone in having a husband who doesn’t read their writing.

    • It’s actually very helpful, thanks for sharing that with me. I’m sorry your husband is also not-so-willing to read and give an opinion, but neither of us are alone.

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